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Look at your clothes from the twenty-third century
You need some brand new stuff
We need to make you more radical too
We need to make you tuff

We need to get you some acid washed blue jeans,
Jordache and Calvin Klein,
A pink Izod shirt with the collar flipped up.
Then you'll be totally fine.

You'd look so awesome in neon
And some wicked Ray Bans.
You'll be much cooler than, like, freon
In OP shirts, pegged jeans and Vans.

I'll take you shopping at my galleria
To get you some haute couture.
We'll get you some hair gel and parachute pants -
Totally tubular!

Our world in the twenty-first century
Seems like one big stupid fad.
Sometimes life is totally bogus.
You're here, and it's totally rad.

All other guys are so grody.
I am so stoked you are here.
We should be totally boinking.
I'll be your final frontier.

Guys in the valley just all barf me out.
I like my boyfriends mature.
You're like as old as my grandpa, no doubt,
But you're a he-man for sure!

Our world in the twenty-first century -
Most guys here are just major tools.
Sometimes I just want someone gnarly.
You're here, and it's totally cool.

Like I'm so sure I would totally bag it.
I wanna be your boy toy.

Oh my gawd, I am so mega-spazzin!

You want me bad?

No Doi!!


from Khaaaaan! the Musical, released May 10, 2011
Vocals by Amy Hurrelbrink. Lyrics by Tara Varney and Michelle Cotton. Music by Tim Gillespie and Michelle Cotton. Recorded by Howie at Mr. Furious Records.




Bryan Colley Kansas City, Missouri

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